Peace in the Quiet

It was on my 25th birthday that I packed up my whole world to enter a new one.
There isn't really any way to describe the feeling that you're left with after driving 70 miles on a gravel road to reach a destination that is in the middle of nowhere. It isn't really like any other I've ever felt. Panicky, would be a great way to describe it. I know the hunters and recreational fishermen who have made it their vacation destination for years, feel the complete opposite. When you have two boys under the age of 4 in the back seat, and you know that it's not a vacation spot, but a little more of a permanent destination, your thoughts tend to go a little static.

When we arrived at the house, I texted my Mom to tell her we were still alive (we are able to communicate with our iphones because of the wireless...messages are sent through imessage). I looked at my phone a few minutes later and the message had not gone through. The wireless was not working and we were left with no option of contact with the outside world except for the police radio. Soooo my complete detox from society began.

Silence can be a very scary thing when you're used to a LOT of noise, to too much noise. Those first couple of days of "silence" for me were so unsettling. The house was a complete and total disaster...boxes were everywhere, the boys were everywhere, and my husband was busy trying to get organized for his first day of work. I had no family members...or any humans that I knew, close by to come over and watch the boys for an hour so I could get caught up on house work and unpacking. That first week, my thoughts narrowed. I no longer had any concerns with what everyone else was thinking about at home...I didn't know what they were thinking because they were out of reach. Their thoughts were not accessible to me. My two children, my husband, my dog, myself, and our daily routines and needs were what concerned me. Exactly the way it should be, right?

After the first couple of days, the house started looking better and I was able to get the boys used to a new schedule. It took me several days to work up the nerve to go for a walk with the boys without Evan. I grew up playing in the woods. My little brother and I would go out for hours behind our house exploring. I wouldn't say that I'm afraid of being outside alone, but when you're 82 miles from the nearest hospital, your mind tends to run rampant with worst case scenarios. If something were to happen while we were on our walk, I would have to run back to our house to use the police radio or I'd have to run to the logging depot and hope someone was there so I could use the phone. Evan had seen a couple of bear cross the road in the few days we had been there....just a couple of reasons why I needed to work up the nerve to go for a walk!

When we got to the lake we walked down to the end of the dock. Andrew and I sat down and watched Jackson "fish" with his fishing pole. There was no one else around...it was so quiet. The sun was shining and the clouds were moving. I took a deep breath and heard nothing...and felt everything. I had a peace in my heart that I hadn't had in a long time. It was at this time that I really felt a sense of peace with my new home and with myself. The feeling that you get when you take a deep breath and your whole body relaxes when you exhale. I hadn't felt that feeling in a LONG time. The past year had been non stop go go go....my thoughts had not had any time to stop. Not once. I was constantly looking ahead. Looking forward to something that hadn't happened yet and losing little pieces of the present. During that first week it was truly as if my whole being was detoxing. My thoughts narrowed drastically. Everything was scaled back. In that moment at the lake, my thoughts were able to catch up and everything went quiet. Everything slowed down. I've never really thought about the phrase "peace and quiet". I think it takes some serious work and self evaluation to be able to be at peace in the quiet.

Winnah Winnah Partridge Dinnah

 

 Evan and I started out on this beautiful fall day to search for some birds. We left Meemaw and the boys at home snug in their beds. It's not often that we get a date nowadays and a good chunk of time riding down dirt roads is always nice! This country is so gorgeous. We ended up seeing two cow moose with one calf each trailing behind.

We tried some new roads we hadn't been down yet. Spotted a bird and I took a shot with the 20 gauge but I was too far away and it hopped up in the woods. I was so discouraged that I lowered the gun and started back to the blazer. Evan used a bit of profanity, disgusted with my attitude of defeatedness, and told me to walk toward the alders where the bird disappeared. I walked closer and I was able to see only his head peaking out the other side of a tree. I took the shot and feathers flew. It was a VERY exciting moment. I will admit there were a few tears....I was ecstatic.

 We came back to the house and Evan walked me through the process of skinning and cleaning the bird.

I grabbed onto the partridge feet and lined up my feet on either side of the breast and directly on top of the wings.  

 

And he told me to pull.

And so I did.....

 

And there you have it....good ole partridge breast!


So after this excitement had ended....Mom, the boys, and I went for a walk to the airline and back around to the house. We saw four partridge off to the side of the road, and it gave me an itch to go back out. Came home, packed the boys up in the blazer and off we went. Spotted the first one pretty quickly. Fired and feathers flew.

 

But.....he wouldn't die.

 



He kept flippin and floppin.


And I got the giggles.

And Evan wasn't around and I had no freaking clue what to do!

Thank goodness I didn't have to do anything. He stopped breathing and I threw him in the bag. I got one more and we headed home.

The view on the way home.



 

 

 

So after the fun, I had to get to work....but really...cooking doesn't usually seem like work to me! I read a little bit on what pairs well with partridge from the Joy of Cooking cookbook and a common theme seemed to be citrus. I immediately thought of an orange chicken recipe I'd found on foodgawker months ago. Evan and I were both nervous about how we'd feel about the flavor/texture of the partridge compared to chicken. We've both tried it before but it had been way overcooked with little to no flavor added. I knew the marinade would be pretty important.

 

A problem when you're shooting your dinner.....if you don't get a clean shot...the pellets end up buried in the meat. For the record...this wasn't one of my birds...it was Evan's!!! aahaha!

 

 

After I cleaned up the breasts, I cut them up into bite size pieces. I had to use 5 partridge breasts. I get easily distracted and I didn't bother to read the recipe for the orange chicken after I got done reading about the citrus marinade in the Joy of Cooking....SO I ended up doubling up on a marinade. You will see that the marinade in the Orange Chicken recipe is heated first and then dumped on the chicken. This one is not....so yours won't look like this but I just liked the picture. :D

I love onions and red peppers paired with this recipe. You could do whatever vegetable you wanted. I think broccoli would be great or even green beans. I just sautéed them lightly and threw them into the sauce at the end.

Bringing the sauce to a boil right before adding the partridge.

 

It seems like every time I make this for dinner...I regret putting the chicken in the sauce. When the chicken gets deep fried it's nice and crispy on the outside...and when the sauce is added, it takes away some of that crispiness. It's not too bad if you don't let it sit for long.  

 

AND the finished product. From dirt road to dinner table. Delish.
Find the recipe here: http://www.homeindisarray.com/2012/01/happy-new-year-orange-chicken.html



He is excited about the day he will be able to join us! :)

Diva Grilled Cheese

Diva grilled cheese.

 

There's something so amazing about carbs, butter, and processed cheese all melded together. When waitressing at Helen's Restaurant in Machias, I never understood people who ordered a grilled cheese. Really? You go out to eat and you order a grilled cheese? I will say that there is something about a restaurant grill and that homemade bread that makes it a little easier to understand. One special lady that I know, ordered a grilled cheese EVERY TIME SHE CAME TO EAT. However, this was no ordinary grilled cheese. This grilled cheese is kind of like a diva grilled cheese in that there are certain elements that are absolutely necessary to make it amazing. Pickled jalapenos, American cheese (not yellow...it just bothers me), and wheat bread (or white bread...)....that is the grilled cheese part.

But there are two more things that you HAVE to have with this grilled cheese. Salty potato chips and sour cream. Sadly enough, the potato chips that I have here in Clayton Lake are not what I prefer. You need a potato chip with substance....something like a rippled Lay's potato chip. And I have to have my sour cream cold cold cold...so I put it in the freezer for a little bit before I'm ready to eat this scrumptious meal. Because of the minced red onion that I like to add to my sour cream, when my husband came inside to give me a kiss, he said, "Your breath could gag a maggot." Baha

 There's something about the saltiness of the chips, the creaminess and coolness of the sour cream, the crispy bread, the smooth cheese, and the spicy jalapenos. Almost stupidly simple yet so delicious. It's amazing. Try it. You might love it.